On being a 2 x 4 (on being a two by four)

For those not familiar with this vernacular, a 2×4 (two by four) is a bit of wood, 2 inches by 4 inches in cross-section. It is sometimes brandished as a defensive or offensive weapon. You use a 2×4 to beat someone into submission … or, more correctly, a metaphorical 2×4 … lest you wind up on the wrong side of the law.
This post is about the actualization of the metaphor. Systems admins and support folks will call this a LART. There are several alternative but quite similar definitions of a LART. Ok, we aren’t a LART. We are more of a VART. Change the “L” word to “Vendor”.
This is also a post I have worked on, on and off over the years. I have sometimes thought of writing it, and as a catharsis, I had. Deleting it right away. Wouldn’t make sense to publish it. Or maybe it does. I dunno. So, here it goes.

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Bandwidth woes, hopefully a thing of the past

In moving to our new facilities, we changed from an 11 Mb/1.5 Mb line to a 6 Mb/0.8 Mb line. This was due to the availability of service to that area. Yeah, we could do a 1.5 Mb/1.5 Mb T1 line, but this is slow compared to what we had, and our experience with SLAs suggests that they aren’t honored as we might like.
So we installed the 6 Mb line. And rapidly discovered our maximum speed was, to our horror, 1.5 Mb/0.6 Mb. This after we were promised the 6 Mb/0.8 Mb line.

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